Do you ever feel that you were someone completely different two years ago, 2 months ago, perhaps even 2 days ago? My confession is that I just caught myself trying to copy someone I was last year. That brief period of a few months where things felt like they were fully in place, where my thoughts were grounded and my wellbeing, well, was at its best. Who is that? Why do we change like that? Why is it that we don’t stay, even when we have found a place that felt right? How do we stay sane? We are the holders of vulnerable perspectives about life, the impressionable youths who were born almost 30 years ago but still feel as though the ’90s were 10 years ago.
Where do we say, this feels enough? this job is good for the next 5 years. Who do we choose to be, once and for all, which story makes the most sense to us about our life? It can’t be possible that they all do! What then? What now, which story is this? Is this the one where we go on an Instagram worthy picturesque vacation and find that life was meant to be lived that way? Or is this the one were we become parents of the modern child, and we share everything about our child’s life since birth with the world. Are we the eternally trying to SHOW the world something? What about money, where do we get that? There’s a lot of help online, from people telling us that we are the greatest and most desperate generation to ever walk the earth; why? because we have the world in the palms of our hands. But then what, are we all really so interesting? What is interesting nowadays anyway?
It seems that change has become a staple of our modern day. Transformations that once took 100 years, now take 10, even 5. Let me tell you this: It feels like the amount of living that people used to do in 100 years, we now do in 20. The level of exposure people used to have by the time they were 20, 8-year-olds now are more exposed. So how do we digest that? How do we live a life that now “COULD” be so much “MORE”? How do we cope with everything we get to do, everything we get to learn and everything we don’t. We do have more time- at least that’s what it feels like. But with too much perceived time on our hands come desperation and confusion.
Perhaps that is the weight of being a part of a generation that saw an immense change not just within ourselves during adolescence but within the world.
There comes a point where something must make sense. There isn’t one single calling, there are infinite ones it seems. The secret and I write this as a note to myself, and hopefully to you, is to actually become more picky about our multi-purpose existence. We do not need to do everything, or know everything or be everywhere. It requires a step back, and a hug from a dear heart, take my virtual arms if you like- but the truth is, we need to CHILL THE F OUT. By we, I mean “I”.
Grab a coffee, eat a piece of the pie, look out at the cloudy weather and stop fighting the universe for more. We already have it all, the choices are constantly laid out for us; all we need to do is choose one, maximum two; but not all. SIMPLE. Right?
OK. I know. #HardestThingEVER.